Three average Joes from Baltimore, MD sharing humorous stories and opinions with a flare for the crude, low brow, and sometimes even dark. By reflecting on their own personal histories, pop culture potluck, conspiracy theories and other wacky topics, these guys will make you laugh and maybe even think. But mostly laugh.
April 14th, 2021 | 3 hrs 34 mins
babe ruth, bar stool sports, bill hicks, charles barkley, charles manson, conrad murray, dave portnoy, derrick chauvin, don rickles, donald trump, elon musk, elvis presley, georgia, howard stern, immigration, jim breuer, jimi hendrix, joe biden, joe rogan, jre, matt gaetz, michael jackson, michael rappaport, mlb all star game, nikola tesla, o.j. simpson, paul mccartney, stuttering john, tucker carlson, us presidents, voter reform
Another strong episode in the books for the trio at the octagon. Guinea Juan graces us with his presence for number 49, along with those Sicilian rants we all know and love. The Beer Can is in rare form as we pick apart Matt Gaetz, voter reform in Georgia, and corruption in Baltimore City. We go around the table and ask what three people, living or dead, we'd like to have over for dinner. Guinea Juan craps all over Tucker Carlson while BCB explains his hatred for Stuttering John from the Stern Show. This podcast is a wild ride and you'll get off confused, slightly nauseous, and strangely wanting more. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARRRREEEEE!!!!!!
March 28th, 2021 | 2 hrs 54 mins
andre the giant, belts, butch reed, covid, cuomo, donald trump, duane johnson, greg "the hammer" valentine, horror movies, hulk hogan, james earl ray, jimmy hart, joe biden, looney tunes, louis ck, martin luther king jr., michael d. higgins, michael jackson, mlk, nfl, owen hart, politics, racism, rick rude, teachers, the rock, top 50 selling artists, wrestling
The gang is back at the table. Scott is in studio with the Beer Can and the debauchery ensues. With a quick dip in the poo-litical cess pool, the conversation quickly gets hijacked by a walk down professional wrestling's memory lane. And then we dive right back into the dumpster fire that is politics. This show is like a fart in the wind, the stench knows no direction. We talk about the illusion of choice, the top 50 selling artists of all time, and Owen Hart's tragic ending. What more could you ask for? DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE!
February 22nd, 2021 | 3 hrs 32 mins
baltimore orioles, bias, capitol, carol king, cleveland indians, dionne warwick, donald j trump, impeachment, jay z, larry king, legalization, losing virginity, mary j blige, media, morgan wallen, ohio, psychics, re-elect no one, rock and roll hof, rusty kuntz, shimp, tina turner, trailers, treasures, trey mancini, usps, violence
The boys bring it back to the studio and whip up another tantalizing talk of twisted topics. Guinea Juan shares his most recent treasures from his father's house of awesomeness while Beer Can Billy tells a tale of the stinkiest stogie this side of Dundalk. We cover politics, sports, music, the human experience of life in a trailer park. We do our annual critique of this year's "Rock and Roll" HOF nominees and find out that the Beer Can is a huge Dionne Warwick fan, who knew? Do yourself a favor, crack open a Founder's Backwoods Bastard, listen to this episode and forget about your troubles while we discuss our troubles. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE SHARE!
January 29th, 2021 | 3 hrs 2 mins
alex trebek, barry glassman, beastie boys, boulevard brewing, donald trump, hillary clinton, home improvements, james comey, joe biden, john podesta, legalizing drugs, mike tyson, nancy pelosi, oregon, right vs left, rolling stone top 50 albums, roy jones jr., sean connery, seattle, ufc, washington, wikileaks
Oh how time flies. It's been a while since you've heard the boys around the octagon so here we are. Like a fine wine, we're fruity and will stain your blouse. Guinea Juan is in the studio, at least most of him, bringing that West Coast charm while Beer Can Billy counters with his best East Coast meathead. An epic tale of the tape.
October 22nd, 2020 | 3 hrs 53 secs
2001 mtv vmas, 9/11, album releases, austin, baseball, buying shoes, chester bennington, children of the corn, china, covid, crapping your pants, debate, dick tracy, dream theater, economy, false flags, fred durst, gift giving, hershey's yuengling, jerry nadler, joe biden, joe rogan, john podesta, kerry von erich, lantern flies, linda hamilton, masks, mlb, new jersey, nfl, party music, poop, pro wrestling, rick moranis, rob ford, sarah huckabee sanders, sports, staind, stephen king, stink bugs, texas, the coup, the world trade center, trump, truth or dare, yard sales
LEGENDARY! The Trio Nuevo strikes again with Jeff, Beer Can, and Scott makin' the magic happen for episode 45B (details inside). From Presidential COVID to doom and gloom come winter time. From "Truth or Dare" gone wrong to crapping your pants while trippin'. From prophetic album covers released on 9/11 to deep throatin' McDonald's soft serve. We have a little something for everyone. Beer Can Billy is still handing out fake scratch-offs and Sarah Huckabee Sanders is still killin' our boners. If this isn't the best thing you've listened to all week then John Podesta isn't the father of Chester Bennington. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE.
August 29th, 2020 | 3 hrs 42 mins
adrenochrome, aliens, amish, bam margera, beirut, ben shapiro, bill clinton, bob odenkirk, cardi-b, comedy, commentaries, cynic route, david cross, donald trump, elon musk, george soros, ghislaine maxwell, gordon ramsay, hart, jeffrey epstein, jfk assassination, joe biden, kamala harris, kennedy, kitchen nightmares, koch brothers, michelle obama, mr.show, ocean city md, october surprise, old habits, satire, smash mouth, snl, stanley kubrick, summer love golden ale, susan rice, tom hanks, twister, victory brewery, vince mcmahon, von erich, wap, war of 1812, ween, william barr, woodstock 99, wwe
Like a fine bagged wine, we take a chug and slap this one on the pouch. Another phenomenal episode of TTCR in the archive thanks to our special poo-litical pundit and comrade, Scott. Jeff and Beer Can Billy sit back and listen to the plethora of knowledge, ranging from U.S. Presidents to Professional Wrestlers, and those that overlap.
We figure out the possible scenarios for the 2020 election, take a mini dive into the Adrenochrome /Epstein/Elite Pedophile ring conspiracy, and we jam out with our clams out to Ben Shapiro's favorite summer hit by Cardi B, WAP.
The October Surprise is coming whether you like it or not , so you why not download this episode, grab a Victory Summer Love Ale, and listen to us solve the JFK assassination right before listing our favorite SNL cast members. You know who downloads this Podcast?...Your Mom. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE!
June 18th, 2020 | 3 hrs 42 mins
2112, abraham lincoln, brian posehn, cheech and chong, chris cuomo, cnn, conor mcgregor, coronavirus, covid-19, donald trump, driving hand signals, fauci, george floyd, gettysburg, great lakes brewery, jane miller, jfk, jimmy buffett, john lennon, kevin costner, kobe bryant, neil peart, omar vasquez, porter, proper 12, rush, sally thorner, salt n pepa, sarah silverman, sophomore slump, squirting, terry owens, twitter, up in smoke, wbal, white privilege, wuhan lab, yoko ono
The world is falling apart and we are watching with a Great Lakes Porter in one hand and our pud in the other. Guinea Juan is live in studio once again and brings the heat. We cover all of society's problems, solve them, and then tell dick jokes for three hours. Just another day in the office.
We tackle hard hitting issues like racism, white privilege, squirting, hand signals for driving...all of the important stuff. Honestly, at this point we should be categorized as a self help podcast. Do yourself a favor and listen now, before they ASSUME CONTROL. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SHARE, SUBSCRIBE.
June 1st, 2020 | 3 hrs 17 mins
allman brothers, american amber ale, barack obama, bell's brewery, billy joel, black crowes, chia pet, chris cornell, conor mcgregor, dave grohl, eggs, elton john, eric clapton, hillary clinton, hypnotize, jesus christ, joe biden, john lennon, julian lennon, le'veon bell, monica lewinsky, neil young, notorious big, pearl jam, proper 12, ram 1500, sean lennon, september 11th, sopranos, soundgarden, term limits, underoos, yoko ono, zeitgeist
The Guinea's back in TOWN! Jeff and Beer Can Billy welcome back John, in person, at the octagon. Bringin' the RUCKUS to that ASS. We cover all of life's nuance from buying a new vehicle, to near death experiences, to the best concerts we ever attended. BCB brought his bag of hate, Jeff puts on the tin foil hat for 9/11 talk, and Guinea Juan sings about his choad. We get a little poo-litical with Joe Biden's Breakfast Club gaff and discuss waiting in between "nuts". Hours of nonsense to get you through your grind and make you question how you're spending your time. Ya better put on a clean pair of Underoos. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE!
May 19th, 2020 | 3 hrs 41 mins
ahmad arbury, alex jones, baltimore ravens, boulevard brewing, coronavirus, covid-19, ed mcmahon, foo fighters, guns n roses, joe biden, joe exotic, john stewart, kim jong un, larry hogan, led zeppelin, legal weed, liam gallagher, michael imperioli, michelle obama, million dollar man, murder hornets, noel gallagher, nursing homes, oasis, paul mccartney, pink floyd, plaid habit, raise some cain, seth meyers, stephen colbert, sue simmons, tara reid, ted, ted dibiase, the beatles, the daily show, the sopranos, the who, tiger king, wally world, washington d.c., ween
The gang is back for another raucous round of bull slingin' banter. Beer Can Billy throws caution to the wind and jumps back in the octagon while Guinea Juan joins us online. Bruce's whereabouts are still unknown for those keeping score at home.
We discuss our new daily routines and lifting the lockdown here in Maryland. Some strong opinions of Larry "The Hog" Hogan are shared in between Soprano's quotes and Pro Wrestling memories. Some interesting Youtube videos ask the hard hitting questions like, "Does Michelle Obama have a Dong?" and "Is Sue Simmons gonna have to Slap a Bitch?"
We talk about family histories, ancestors, and weird Uncles in the basement. There's too many topics to go on about and too much legal weed to remember them all. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SHARE, SUBSCRIBE.
April 30th, 2020 | 2 hrs 58 mins
baltimore, baseball, bill o'reilly, coronavirus, covid-19, fake news, heather mills, hot open mic, italian food, jim norton, kavanaugh, kyle larson, media, miscarriage, nirvana, opie and anthony, orioles, papa roach, paul mccartney, politics, pro wrestling, protests, puddle of mudd, ravens, serial masturbater, shinedown, sopranos, susan collins, tony soprano, uncle junior, white house
Another quarantined episode in the book. Sad to see a milestone like number 40 being done streamed with one guy at the octagon, one guy fumbling with his mic from his basement 5 miles away, and one guy from his garage/cavern 3,000 miles away. But we made it work. In fact, we made up for the garbage sound quality with the quality of our content. Just kidding. No intro, just three hours of the route that is cynic. We gots deadlines to keeps. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SHARE, SUBSCRIBE.
April 23rd, 2020 | 4 hrs 5 mins
abbey road, ac/dc, airlines, appetite for destruction, baltimore, beer, bon scott, boston, brian johnson, bruce springsteen, conspiracies, coors light, coronavirus, covid-19, david lee roth, def leppard, divorce, drinking, foo fighters, green day, guns-n-roses, hairy nipples, howard stern, jameson, kiss, kurt cobain, lesbians, marriage, motley crue, nirvana, orioles, pandemic, parasite, pearl jam, pink floyd, pranks, quarantine, queen, quiet riot, ravens, record albums, rolling stones, sex talk, ten, the beatles, the wall, travel, van halen, whiskey, zoom
The only thing the world needed more than a global pandemic was a four hour long episode of this hot garbage. But here it is, for your ear's delight. Jeff mans the octagon while Beer Can Billy and Guinea John connect via the internets. We go deep into the history of both the Guinea and BCB, where no stone is left unturned. We reminisce about old Howard Stern episodes, our past musical performances, and some classic sports memories. BCB gives us a quaran-tour of his basement and record collection. We talk COVID-19 conspiracies, our hairiest past sexual experiences, and we crap all over Bruce since he was the one who didn't show up this time. Sprinkle in a "Driving Miss Daisy" style handy and some casual racism and I think we have ourselves a show. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE.
March 25th, 2020 | 2 hrs 32 mins
andy harris, beer review, bernie goetz, billy squire, boyd tinsley, charlie sheen, chyna, corey feldman, corey haim, crisco, dave matthews band, donald trump, founders, frank sinatra, impractical jokers, joe biden, john lithgow, kbs, mayo a. shattuck iii, mia farrow, mike gordon, molly shattuck, norm macdonald, opie and anthony, pamela anderson, pat monahan, phish, pro-wrestling, robert loggia, roger ailes, ronan farrow, sable, the view, train, vince mcmahon, wcw, woody allen, wwe, xfl
Hellooo fellow degenerates. The Trio welcomes back the brilliant, the hilarious, the deranged Scotty Monahan. After reviewing a new beer we go straight into the poo-litical talk where Scotty drops some knowledge. The coronavirus is taking over the world but that isn't stopping Beer Can Billy from getting his drink on or Bruce from defending Woody Allen to the bitter end. We discuss Pro-wrestling, Opie and Anthony, and that Raven's cheerleader who banged her son's friend. Corey Feldman's latest craziness creeps into the conversation along with Sleepy Joe Biden, Scott's famous Uncle Pat, and Billy Squire dancing like Guinea John at home alone on a Friday night. So many topics, so few characters allowed for description. Stay safe, keep your distance and never accept a scratch off from Beer Can Billy. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE!
March 9th, 2020 | 2 hrs 15 mins
anquan boldin, artie lange, atlantic star, bad break-ups, baltimore, baltimore ravens, beer review, berry gordy, catherine pugh, coronavirus, derrick mason, dolemite, ed reed, eddie murphy, first jobs, founders, goo goo dolls, grandma, lou ferrigno, mark normand, martin scorsese, masturbation, mayor, meet and greet, mike tyson, pranks, robert deniro, scratch offs, secret lovers, spencer's gifts, the irishman, trailer parks
The new trio welcomes Polack Johnny for some tales of the tail. We share fond(led) memories of Grandma's trailer. Beer Can Billy brings up some more past hijinks and heads our first live beer review. We discuss former Baltimore mayor and cartoon turtle, Catherine Pugh, Atlantic Star's "smash" hit "Secret Lovers," and still the baddest mofo on the planet, Mike Tyson. We reminisce about our first jobs, our first sexual experiences, and garbage celebrity "meet & greets." This one gets off the rails fast so climb aboard the train of terror. Listen now, before the Coronavirus takes your hearing. DOWNLOAD, LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, SHARE!
February 25th, 2020 | 2 hrs 14 mins
baltimore, baltimore ravens, beer can billy, coronavirus, cottonelle, daytona 500, donald trump, genitals, halftime show, hardees, harvey weinstein, j-lo, jeffrey epstein, joe piscopo, pranks, shakira, sign language, super bowl, westboro baptist church, yelp!
Heeeeeere's Billy. Beer Can Billy to be exact. We trade one guinea for another. After a long hiatus the gang is back with more nonsense than ever. The Beer Can tells about past pranks and recent vacations. He have a new Cottonelle Nad-vertisement to dissect, Harvey Weinstein's genitals are nowhere to be found, and Epstein still didn't kill himself. Donald Trump does a lap at Daytona, Bruce reads Yelp! reviews of the Westboro Baptist Church, and Joe Piscopo has always sucked. You get what you pay for here at the Cynic Route. Listen Up, Mutha F*@Ker$! SHARE IT LIKE IT'S THE CORONAVIRUS!
September 25th, 2019 | 2 hrs 14 mins
airports, bad joke telling, bad jokes, bombshell, breaking news, deepfake videos, drinking, gun control, help!, hot cousins, inappropriate laugh tracks, italy, jeffrey epstein, john lennon, lebron james, mark david chapman, mass shootings, sam kinison, schindler's list, sicily, taxi driver, the beatles, the catcher in the rye, the decision, titty man, traveling, washington, yesterday
A very special episode of TTCR as we welcome back Guinea Juan after a brief sojourn overseas. The man himself steals the show with endless rants about airports and traveling, The Catcher in the Rye and Taxi Driver (again), sexy cousins and another visit from the ghost of Sam Kinison -- not to mention a major league, game-changing bombshell. So strap yourself in for some inappropriate laughs and some inappropriate touches, right here on Episode 35 of TAKING THE CYNIC ROUTE.
September 12th, 2019 | 2 hrs 14 mins
9/11, adderall, auto train, baltimore, baltimore orioles, billy joel, camden yards, chris davis, donald trump, fantasy football, fhritp, fletch, flight 93, genesis, illegal alien, jerry sandusky, jim abbott, massage parlor, once upon a time in hollywood, penn state, pennsylvania turnpike, phil collins, porn stars, precious, quentin tarantino, ravens, redner's chicken, robert kraft, shanksville, shaquille o'neal, the fan, the world of coca cola, trey mancini, tweet, yucko the clown
Don't call it a comeback! It's been too long. Beer Can Billy joined the trio for this one a few weeks back and pushed the boundaries of offense. We reminisce about our summer happenings. BCB saw Billy Joel at Camden Yards, drove on the PA turnpike, took a ride on the Auto Train, and visited both the Flight 93 museum and the infamous Robert Kraft Rub-N-Tug parlor. Guinea John made several trips across the globe. From Hawaii to Italy, from Baltimore to Washington, the travelin' Sicilian has added some miles. We discuss Genesis' "Illegal Alien" and its awful video, watch a compilation of a guy insulting wannabe porn stars, and read another fan email. Obscenities, stereotypes and chauvinism...par for the course when you take the route that is cynic. DOWNLOAD, SUBSCRIBE, LIKE, SHARE! It's cooler than the other side of the My Pillow.